Conversations with Strangers

A few days ago, I was reflecting on how easily we can become distracted by work and other things in life.  One of my biggest regrets from the past few years, was not making more time to canoe the rivers back home.  So, I decided it was time to go kayaking!  Not exactly the same thing, but I had on my list a kayak trail in Weedon Island Preserve.  I made a reservation and hit the water early Saturday morning. 
The kayak trail is about 4 miles long and begins at the edge of Tampa Bay.  The trail winds through mangroves and seagrass flats as you navigate between the islands of the preserve.  With the sun already beaming down my back, I headed across the open water.  After only being in my kayak for a few minutes, I heard some movement and was surprised to see dolphins about 30 feet from my boat!  I could not believe how close they were!  I have seen dolphins before but never this close, sharing the water with them.  I leaned back and watched them swim gracefully through the water.  However, I soon realized I could not stop paddling, as the tide was quickly pulling me out of the bay. 
As I continued on the trail (trying to stay closer to the edge), I noticed a few more dolphins that were swimming just a few feet from a group of fishermen standing in the water.  The men must have been used to seeing dolphins because they were completely uninterested.  However, I noticed a girl on a paddleboard nearby that shared my excitement!  We began visiting and she showed me another area of the inlet where a mother and baby were swimming side-by-side.  We continued talking and paddling until we reached the mangroves and parted ways. 

As I continued on my journey alone, I was overwhelmed with a sense of peace and serenity as I paddled along, admiring the beauty of the mangroves and the wildlife.  I started thinking about how grateful I was for the chance to share a special experience with a stranger.  It made me reflect on some of the ways I am changing.  I am finding that as I continue to open myself more to life, I am also feeling more comfortable in my “own skin”.  I notice I am becoming less self-conscious and more genuine. 
By allowing myself to just live, I have given myself the freedom to “not care”.  I know that sounds cliché, but it is true.  Before, I was always concerned about maintaining a certain type of appearance because I wanted to be taken seriously in my career.  Plus, I was living in a small town where gossip spreads like wildfire, so I was very self-conscious about my words and actions.
I was also raised to believe that people’s perceptions of you are just as important as who you really are.  It is hard enough to live a life that we can be proud of, without having the added pressure of trying to control people’s perceptions!  I was constantly worried about pleasing other people and being who I thought they wanted me to be. 
Now, as I try to just focus on living, I can actually enjoy having conversations with people, even complete strangers.  I am so much more comfortable now that I don’t have to be concerned about what people are thinking or how they perceive me.  I don’t have to ruin these special moments by focusing on how my words or actions are being judged, interpreted, or misconstrued.  I don’t have to worry about whether I will spark controversy or be the topic of gossip.  Life is so much more enjoyable without carrying all of these unnecessary burdens!  (I can’t believe it has taken me 31 years to quit caring about what other people think!)